Monday, August 4, 2008

Susan and the Woods


Susan Will raced home on her bike from school. She couldn't wait! Tomorrow she was going to the woods with her mom, dad, and her baby brother Michael who just learned how to walk! She zipped down the sidewalk, wind in her face, her hair flying back! She went faster because she remembered her sleepover for her birthday was at eight when Michael fell asleep. She checked her watch. It was seven! She was turning eleven so she could use the stove to make soup. She honked her horn.

When she got home her mom had food, decorations, cake, music, and pillows! She put tomatoes, broccoli, corn, chicken, celery, and hot water into the pot. She ate quickly. She heard the doorbell ring. Maria, Madaline, Josaphina, and Julia came in. They were followed by Hannah, Hellen, Sophia and Page. Then Kate, Katie, Kathren, Kelly and Anna arrived. Everybody followed Susan to her room. And they partied until they fell asleep.

The next day Susan got into the car. Finally they got to the woods. But when Susan followed a butterfly she got lost.

She walked onto the bridge and looked into the pond. She saw fish, tadpoles, and turtles. She heard wet bushes dripping into the pond with a plink! But she heard something else. Her mom! And she went home safe and happy!



April (Thorup) Oaks said...

Wow! I hope every day isn't this crazy for Susan. It would be fun to hear more about her life in future posts.

Boquinha said...

Holy Hannah! That's a lot of people at that party!! Great story, Sweetie! I love how much you enjoy writing. Great job!

Dr. Mark said...

Your story reminds me of something your brother said when we first moved here: "Holy crap, that's a lot of buses!" In this case it's girls at a sleepover, but you get the idea. I'm loving the description in your stories lately. Great story!

Boquinha said...

By the way, this is my favorite line in your story:

"She zipped down the sidewalk, wind in her face, her hair flying back!"

Someday when you're a totally famous article, this blog will be worth big, big bucks!! What was it Logan said to you today? In the trillions? ;)

Boquinha said...

Oops, totally famous author. Ahem. Not article. Author. What was I telling you about proofreading today? :P

Dr. Mark said...

Wait! That was you that said that! No wonder there are so many girls in this story!

J Fo said...

What a great story! It reminds me of sleepovers when I was younger. That sounds like a great party; I wish I could go!

Zelia said...

WOW! Great story, my favorite so far. I loved the girl's names that came to the sleep over.
Keep up the good writing.

Mom said...

Outstanding descriptions! I could totally 'see' her riding her bike. And I 'heard' the water drip into the pond. I loved that you used "zipped" and "plink." Oh, and the soup recipe sounded delicious. Great job!

Love you lots!

Chiquita said...

Thanks for the comments!

That was funny mommy! :P

emily said...

Wow, she has a lot of friends! Lucky Susan. I love that she has to be eleven to use the stove, too.